Jodee’s message for teens who target others because they are "different":
• Try to recall a moment in your life when you were hurt or humiliated. Really think back on how it made you feel. Was your stomach in knots? Did you feel hurt, angry, sad, scared? How you felt in that second is EXACTLY how the person you’re picking on feels now. EXACTLY. Next time, stop and think before you say or do something that could scar someone forever.

• Even worse than a bully are the people who stand by and watch someone else get hurt. If you see someone being picked on at school, stand up and say something. Tell the bully off. Don’t be a bystander. Stand up and be strong. You’ll be a hero.

Jodee’s message for parents of teen “outcasts”:
• Fix the problem, not your kid. There’s nothing wrong with your child—it’s all the things that are right about him or her that’s making your child a target.

• Don’t ask your child, “What’s wrong with you, why don’t you have any friends?” Instead, TELL your child how much you love them, and encourage their individuality. Tell them it’s OK to be different. They are already being rejected at school; don’t you reject who they are, too.

• Don’t tell your child to ignore the bullies, that they’ll go away. Grown up logic doesn’t work in teen situations. Tell your child to look the mean kid in the eye, don’t show fear, tears or anger, and simply tell them to stop.

• Find alternative social outlets for your child where they can meet other kids their own age outside of school. Church youth groups, YMCA groups, Youth Community Theater, and Arts & Crafts Clubs for kids are just a few examples.

• Look for the warning signs that your child may be a victim of peer cruelty—change in appetite, depression, fits of rage, afraid to ride the school bus, frequent illness or faking of illness, and spending too much time alone in their room.

Jodee’s message for teachers:
• Punishing a bully only makes them heroic to their friends, and anxious to seek vengeance on the snitch who got him into trouble. Teach empathy to the bullies and reward the bystanders who stick up for the underdogs.

• Start a support group in your school for victims of peer cruelty and bullying.

• Don’t have the attitude that teasing is OK, and that it’s just kids being kids. If you see verbal or psychological abuse, reach out to the victim; be the adult friend they need.

• Contact the National Crime Prevention Council—their anti-bullying program, the Be Safe and Sound Campaign, is helping teachers and parents all across the nation address bullying in schools effectively.

ALWAYS REMEMBER!
Jodee says that when kids who are being picked on at school ask her for advice, she tells them: Standing up for yourself in the moment abuse occurs is your human right. Seeking vengeance later on is a mistake

No one should have to endure being teased, bullied, or abused. Cruelity violates a person’s sense of self and others. If you or someone you know – perhaps your son, daughter, student, or a friend – is being bullied at school, you can help. Listen to them. Let them know they are not alone in their struggle. Be compassionate, supportive, and strong.

There are many organizations expert in dealing with troubled teens. Outlined below are four specific recommended resources.

“As far as the impact of your book on me, I think most importantly, it has made me more aware of how I respond to students when they come to me for help. I don't recall any major instances of being bullied myself, so knowing your story helps me feel more compassion and respond immediately when a child comes to me. For that, I thank you.”
—Diane C., Principal

“I just wanted to say thanks - for letting the other rejects and outcasts know that there is hope. There is always hope.”
—Terese D., Teen Reader

“I just finished your book, Please Stop Laughing at Me. It was a wonderful read. Interestingly enough, I remember being immediately drawn to your book in the bookstore. I am sure that you hear this from many people who have read your book. However, it's an amazing read and I think many people can relate to it.”
—Nancy K., Teen Reader

“I think that teenagers ought to read this book. For one thing, I think that it will make them realize that they are not alone in all that they are going through. I believe that everyone has some type of a story to tell about something that happened to them while in school, especially high school. The thing is that at the time you can't see past what you are going through. You don't realize that there IS an end to it all.”
—Rachael V., Adult Reader

“I'm thrilled you have the courage to open your life in this matter… Your book is helping build the closure I have been seeking.”
—Brian V., Adult Reader

“Just wanted to say thanks…What you went through is somehow worth it now that your experience might very well save lives.”
—Dee M., Adult Reader

“My highest kudos to you on such a well-written book! Wish I could do something similar, so as to help other kids to know that they don't have to accept such ill treatment, and for adults to know that their pain can be healed.”
—Lynne L., Adult Reader

“Your book is such an asset to those of us who were so terrified of going to school because of the horrifying things that happened to us. Thank you for this wonderful book. I want you to know that it has helped me to see how my own experiences led me to be who I am now.”
—Angela W., Adult Reader

“You're an inspiration to others.”
—Michael C., Adult Reader

“I just finished reading, Please Stop Laughing at Me. I could relate pretty well to most of your experiences. I'm only 15, so I'm still going through some of them. I get made fun of, but there are kids who get made fun of a lot worse then me at my school. I will stand up for them all the time, now.”
— Grace P., Teen Reader

“I just barely finished reading your book "Please Stop Laughing at Me". I could not put it down. I cannot express to you the amount of respect I have for your accomplishments despite the difficult times you endured as a child. I have learned much from reading this book. …I found your book to be uplifting—how you look at life so positively now. Honestly, it has made me look deep into how I treat others, whether we are children or adults there is something said for the "Golden Rule". I want to thank you as I know reading your book has made, and will continue to make, me a better person.”
—Amy O., Adult Reader

“I just wanted to thank you for this amazing story…I feel it is very important that every teacher should read this book and beware of what is really going on in & out of the classrooms!”
—Cheryl G., Adult Reader

“Not a lot of people realize how big an issue bullying is today. How many kids fear walking to school, going to their next class, or running into one of their peers every day. And I think that it sucks that they have to live like that, that people can't just accept other people for their differences and get to know them before they actually judge them. Because being a kid is supposed to be one of the best times of your lives, the most memorable stage ever, and crying yourself to sleep at night over the fear of having to go to school the next day just ruins it!”
— Kerry, Teen Reader

“Once again, thanks so much for coming all the way to Pickard yesterday. Not only were you such a huge hit with my students, but the other teachers were all singing your praises today.”
—Diego M., Teacher

“I spoke with my group of kids on the way home about how our actions today effect others for some time and that we should think about what we do before we act.”
— Officer Pat


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